Impossible to Dislike

       I grew up in the 60s and the 70s, and I made pretty much every mistake that someone who grew up during the period could make. And I honestly believe that the people who were responsible for creating the chaos then, are the parents of people who sit up on their hill tops laughing at us now. I still bear a lot of hidden scars from that upbringing, but I consider myself lucky that after I had reached bottom, God had mercy on me and showed me the way out.

       I met Steve Brown after that epiphany. He hired me right out of college to teach Reading and English at John Muir Middle School, and I stayed there for the next 31 years. He handed me a set of keys my first day of work, and that night I actually cried while looking at them and holding them in my hand. I didn't believe I was anywhere near that trustworthy, and it fully hit me just how ashamed of myself I had been made to feel because of who I had been as a kid.

       What followed though were the best years of my life. My kids were young, my marriage was strong, and I was given the freedom to begin anew. Mr. Brown was the best boss I had ever had because he trusted us to do the job we were hired to do and gave us the freedom to do it. It was exactly what I needed at the time, some trust and the freedom to grow. He truly liked people, and before, I never knew bosses were allowed to do that. Mr. Brown also gets the credit for putting me on my true career path as a coach.

      I have to admit that back then, sometimes Steve annoyed me because when I was angry and venting about something, he never seemed to understand how angry I thought those things should have made him too. It took me years to learn how right he was about that stuff. He preferred to maintain a more balanced perspective and to always give himself the option of trying to find something more positive in the situation. I think it was his greatest gift. He chose to maintain a calm sanguinity over anger. It made him almost impossible to dislike. I say almost impossible because there is always some people who are going to hate you when they force you to hold a mirror up to their own ignorance. You can't be an administrator of any stripe without running into those people. What is admirable though, is when you can listen to their unfounded complaints and emerge without the feeling the need for vengeance. Another gift.

          When Roscoe Bessey died a few years ago, I remembered feeling infinitely sad and wondering where we were going to find someone to fill the hole he left in this community. I remembered thinking that there wasn't one single person who could do it, but a lot of people would just have take to take up a little more space.

          The thing that makes me the most sad about Steve's passing is that this old world got a whole lot more crazy the last few years. There's a lot of us who need good role models to show us how to go about our lives and not to get caught in all the anger, the hate, and the craziness.

      And while I feel a little more optimistic about how some of these youngins are proving themselves worthy, there still seems to be a whole lot more out there who would rather just pretend.

      That means we can ill afford to lose anyone who knew how to play that role, much less someone who played it so well.